If a desire is left entirely alone it will fade quickly. However, in most cases a rather lengthy withdrawal process is required.
Far better than avoiding the desire in action but internally longing for it, is to go to it willingly but snatch your head out of the lion's mouth at the last moment.
Go right up to the beautiful and desirable thing and look at it dispassionately in the full light of wisdom and reality. Watch the cracks appear and the desire start to crumble away. See the worm inside the apple.
All things, thoughts and conditioned states wear three marks:
The mark of impermanence, or anicca.
The mark of suffering, or dhukka.
The mark of not-self, or anatta.
It brings so much freedom in the mind and heart to see these marks in the things that would otherwise bind us with desire or fear.
Knowing what we are afraid of is impermanent makes all the difference. Seeing that within every desirable state or thing is a little kernel of suffering helps us not get (too) attached.
Understanding not-self, that we do not have an ego or controlling self, is a powerfully freeing thought; all our troubles, pain, happiness, hopes, plans and dreams wash up against... nothing. Leaving us free in this present moment to act as we will.
Which is all there is.
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